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- My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.
- Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
- After that, I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
- Next, I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting.
- Then, I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme*.
- I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.
- My best job was a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
- I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
- Next, was a job in a shoe factory. I tried, but I just didn't fit in.
- I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
- I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
- So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
- After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian -- until I realized there was no future in it.
- My last job was working in Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
- So, I tried retirement and found that I'm perfect for the job. Man do I enjoy it!!!
* A plant of the mint family, with leaves used for seasoning. It is pronounced time.
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